One of the most detrimental habits I've learned that I have is the tendency to evaluate everything constantly, whether it needs it or not. I'm very good at explaining and rationalizing the actions of others, and also at applying shifting guilt, and I am empathic to the point where I really do believe I know what is going through others' minds most of the time, so these spontaneous judgements can send me into exhausting thought spirals at the drop of a hat. It happens all the time. Alllll. The tiiiiiime.
I've tried to stop judging, tried to think positive, tried to turn of the thought spirals, etc. But none of these have borne much fruit, except to show me that I judge a lot and that this, perhaps more than anything else, tires me out! So I've decided to try a more patient, measured, and recorded approach this time.
Before I try to stop doing anything, I guess maybe I need to get a handle on what it is I'm doing. Which of the thoughts I have are judging -- and just as importantly, which ones aren't? After all, I don't want to stop thinking or being discerning entirely. I'm not going for catatonic, just... peaceful.
So for the next day at least, I will simply work on observing which thoughts are judgemental, noticing them when they happen.
Day 2, maybe I can tackle brief periods of trying to rework them into non-judgmental ideas once I've thought them.
Day 3 and 4 will probably be for doing that for longer periods of time.
If, by Day 5, I'm feeling competent at that, the next challenge will be to try during a few short periods to substitute the altered thought patterns for judgmental ones (taking the initiative to think non-judgmentally first, rather than catching and changing after the fact).
Then, I can practice doing that for the rest of the week. By next Tuesday, at the latest, I should have an update including progress, challenges, and any resulting changes to the program.
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