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| My first GIMP creation: Teaching Time I need to find something motivating to work for this January. |
I find myself really unmotivated to go back to school Monday. I know, we all do, twas the season and all that. But this past term was actually the most painstaking, stressful four months of my life so far, and although I keep trying to tell myself it'll get easier, my body and soul don't believe it yet.
My other powerful prior motivation, the fact that a teacher is there to help kids, is still definitely a priority -- but at my core, I'm not honestly sure that the teacher I am right now is being helpful, or that with the way things are going, I'll be able to get far enough to get good enough to be significantly helpful in the future.
I need a motivation to go in on Monday. Right now, I'll be going in for the paycheck and simply surviving (read: dreading) every second of it. And I don't accept that, not as somebody who's going to be spending her day influencing a group of young minds. It wouldn't be ethical, wise, useful, pleasant or healthy for anybody.
So what I need, in summary, is something to work for this January. Something besides getting to the other side of Term 1 report cards with both my soul and my career intact.
I understand. It can be so hard sometimes as a new teacher, especially with such little security. I've definitely struggled the last couple of years. I enjoy it the most when I focus on the students in the present moment and less on the ministry and the admin and thinking about where I'll be in the future. Best of luck this Monday. I hope you can find some joy in your interactions with the kids!
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