Design what?

First-off, let me make clear that if you're searching for a web-savvy designer who's looking to get her name out or test out some innovative visual concepts and you've landed here, you'll probably want to try your search again. Don't get me wrong -- I love visitors. However, in spite of the title, this is far from being a blog about design, and I am far from being a designer.

The phrase "my own design", from John Mayer's "Something's Missing", has a three-fold meaning here.

• Firstly, the meaning implied by the song itself, that we can sometimes create our own states of mind, our own sadness, our own lack, our own loneliness, without realizing it. I believe that I do this, but I also know that much of it is beyond my sole control, and I am taking steps (more on this later, most likely) to acquire whatever assistance I need to start getting out of my own way.
• Secondly, I am both exploring and constructing the answers to the question "Who am I?" What's behind D, how is she put together, what makes her work, or not work as the case may be -- in other words, what is my own design?
• Thirdly, since I began to be more aware of myself and the things I and the world can do to get in my way, I have been conscious of the fact that there are ways to do what needs to be done in ways better or worse for me, and that these ways only sometimes conform to the ways that are adopted as normal or acceptable. Sometimes I need a little trial and error and a little self-awareness to recognize the best way for me to go about something, but once I do recognize it, I adopt it -- by design.

This blog isn't necessarily about anything, other than whatever I have to say when I say it here. However, I have in mind, as a possible theme of the moment, a loose documentation of my path to increased self-awareness, self-care, inter- and intrapersonal well-being, and (I ultimately hope) happiness. We shall see how things move forward.